I think I have one every Tuesday night. And every Thursday.
Tuesday night anxiety attacks are related to the overwhelmed feeling that I get when I attend class for various reasons. The first possible reason is that people always talk about credentialing programs and getting into it. Prior to applying to a credentialing program, one must pass the CBEST and 3 CSET's...all standardized tests, mind you. I HATE standardized tests. On top of that I just have to keep thinking about that fact that I still have 18-24 months left of schooling once I graduate with my BA...to barely get paid anything for the amount of work that I'll be doing. If my anxious feeling isn't related to credentialing, then it's probably because of the fact that this accelerated program has a ton of at home/do-on-your-own work. It can be done and once I get home and start doing the work, it's not that bad. But when we're going over what needs to be done....ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Thursday (day) anxiety attacks are because I realize that it's already Thursday, which means the week is almost over, which means the month is almost over, which means I'm almost graduated, which means I need to figure out my life, etc....dramatic? Yes, absolutely. But without fail, I always have a Thursday "freak out" as my "old" roommate, Lindsey would call them.
Do I REALLY have anxiety attacks? No, probably not. Do I totally over think things and mildly freak out? Ohhhhh yes. And today is Tuesday, and I just recovered from being stressed over both credentialing and the work load tonight. So fun.
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
Monday, March 22, 2010
Life Update
I'm beginning to realize that more people read this than I think. So, for those of you who read this to try to catch up on my life...I apologize because I haven't given you many updates, and my most recent post wasn't a super uplifting one. So I'll try to summarize life since the last post:
1. Tutoring is going well. I have days where I think to myself, "This is exactly where I want to be...this is why I'm here!" because it goes so great, and then I have days where I think to myself, "Get me out of here...I never ever ever ever want to teach again!" It all depends. Such is life though. I tutor a total of 6 kids. The highlight of my week is going to my two girls' house that I talked about in the previous post. They're both so eager to learn and you can tell that they're just aching for love. Their home is so incredibly broken and I want to show them as much love and hope as I possibly can during my time with them.
2. We're going through Song of Solomon at The Well. SO GOOD! http://thewellcommunity.org/podcast/the-feed/1. If you're interested, check it out. I get SO excited to go to church every Sunday. Like, I get butterflies in my stomach-excited. Excited for what God will speak to me through the teaching pastor of the night, so excited for worship and so excited for hanging out with so many people my age who are passionate about the Lord. I also just started teaching a 2nd grade Sunday School class with one of my room mates and it's a lot of fun!
3. Homework overload. It's true, but it's just a fact of life. This too shall pass.
4. Baseball season is finally hereeeeeeee! Need I say more? I love going to Fresno State baseball games and I especially love getting to watch all of my brothers play. And I just love basking in the sun eating seeds. Nothing gets me more than the sound of metal cleats and metal bats. Weird, I know.
5. WASHINGTON!!!!!!! My heart is just so excited. I'm going to Washington the end of May for a few days because one of my cousins is getting married. I'm so excited for her and I'm especially excited to see all my beautiful WA family's faces.
For now, that's everything. I'm sure there's more to tell, but I need to finish doing homework because my goal for bedtime tonight was 11:30 and it's 11:24. I doubt I'll be able to accomplish 1.5 pages in 6 minutes. Maybe I could...but it's doubtful. And I know that I say this all of the time, but I really will try to be more faithful in my blogging. :)
1. Tutoring is going well. I have days where I think to myself, "This is exactly where I want to be...this is why I'm here!" because it goes so great, and then I have days where I think to myself, "Get me out of here...I never ever ever ever want to teach again!" It all depends. Such is life though. I tutor a total of 6 kids. The highlight of my week is going to my two girls' house that I talked about in the previous post. They're both so eager to learn and you can tell that they're just aching for love. Their home is so incredibly broken and I want to show them as much love and hope as I possibly can during my time with them.
2. We're going through Song of Solomon at The Well. SO GOOD! http://thewellcommunity.org/podcast/the-feed/1. If you're interested, check it out. I get SO excited to go to church every Sunday. Like, I get butterflies in my stomach-excited. Excited for what God will speak to me through the teaching pastor of the night, so excited for worship and so excited for hanging out with so many people my age who are passionate about the Lord. I also just started teaching a 2nd grade Sunday School class with one of my room mates and it's a lot of fun!
3. Homework overload. It's true, but it's just a fact of life. This too shall pass.
4. Baseball season is finally hereeeeeeee! Need I say more? I love going to Fresno State baseball games and I especially love getting to watch all of my brothers play. And I just love basking in the sun eating seeds. Nothing gets me more than the sound of metal cleats and metal bats. Weird, I know.
5. WASHINGTON!!!!!!! My heart is just so excited. I'm going to Washington the end of May for a few days because one of my cousins is getting married. I'm so excited for her and I'm especially excited to see all my beautiful WA family's faces.
For now, that's everything. I'm sure there's more to tell, but I need to finish doing homework because my goal for bedtime tonight was 11:30 and it's 11:24. I doubt I'll be able to accomplish 1.5 pages in 6 minutes. Maybe I could...but it's doubtful. And I know that I say this all of the time, but I really will try to be more faithful in my blogging. :)
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